How the fuq do you trade this shit?

So, you want to get into this. Ok.

First you will need Bitcoin. There are generally three ways to do this:

1) The way everybody does it that sucks because they don't know any better (coinbase).

2) A Bitcoin ATM. What I would do if I didn't mine coins.

3) Mine coins. If you mine anything, you can use those coins to start building a bigger pile. (You can get started with CPU mining here: Mining For Exchanges Part 1: HitBTC or, How To Play A Small Exchange)

I recommend Jaxx Wallet. You will need your own wallet to actually hold the coins

You'll notice Jaxx works on literally every platform, and can receive a lot of different kinds of coins.

Once you have Bitcoin, you need an exchange. I suggest getting at least two:

For contrast, I'm using 12 of them. For this blog I cover 3 of them. Poloniex, Bittrex, and HitBTC. The main reason being most of the other exchanges are "long holders" I keep my longs off my daily trading exchanges so I don't accidentally sell something I wanted to keep. I've done it before. 

Once you have your bitcoin (or other coin) and your minimum two exchanges, you need to make a deposit to the exchange. So log in and go to your wallet page. Typically you'll see something like this:

So, all you have to do to make a deposit is find the coin's name in your wallet, and get the Deposit Address. Then it's simply a matter of using your Bitcoin (or other coin) wallet to send your coins to the wallet for that coin on the exchange you picked.

That's it.

You are done. You can start trading. It's important to not feel bad if you could not figure this part out. It's not intuitive. It's not logical. And it's a brand new experience if you've never done it before.


1) IMMEDIATELY enable two-factor authentication. Not kidding. This isn't even up for debate. It's an option for a reason. And don't be lazy. Keep a copy of that 16 digit key or whatever just in case you get locked out of 2FA and need to fix that. It will happen. 

2) Use an ad blocker, or site settings if they allow it, to disable the "trollbox". The trollbox is a tradition on trading sites. It's a chat where people talk smack and typically get banned. For being annoying. Just save yourself time now and block the box or disable it. Nothing good EVER comes out of the trollbox. Ever. All it will do is mislead you into the poorhouse. If you ignore this advice, in the very least never click on a link in the trollbox. Ever. It's always malware. And if you are very smart, get a cheap chromebook. Use it for trading. Chromebooks are a lot more secure than Macs or Windows machines for trading. 

3) Get a copy of Currency Trading for Dummies (also known as Losing Money on Forex For Dummies). Not kidding. Don't use it on Forex. You'll lose money. Use the logic for Crypto Currency though and it's excellent. 

And that's about it. Then start doing your research. After a few days or weeks you'll start getting the market in your head and it will all become straight forward. You'll have milestones. Your first "win" feels good. It makes it all real. Good luck.

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